Tuesday, 20 October 2009

Constantly talking isn't necessarily communicating.

"Random thoughts for Valentine's Day, 2004. Today is a holiday invented by greeting card companies. To make people feel like crap."
- Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

This is one of the most important films in my life; I am completely crushed by it. It feels so much like a reflection of myself, the way I am and the way I love. It simultaenlusly breaks and strengthens my heart. I really want to do a load of quotes for it but as this blog is already mainly quotes I'll leave it! I've been stupid and weak today and I hate myself for it. Why is it so easy to loathe yourself? Why are there so many things that you can do wrong? I really do love Leicester. There's a lot of interesting hippy/goth/alternative shops around once you find 'em! And it's not as busy and pushy as most big cities tend to be. Right now I'm trying to get through my workload. I'm wrestling with strict form poetry - I really cannot get across how much I loathe it! Since when did poetry and emotion and having something to say become all about rules? Well, apparantly, a few hundred years ago when some idiot decided to make it that way! I've had a bash at a terza rima and a sonnet, neither of which are any good. I'm also struggling to make a start on my Writing Identity pieces, I have to write about two first experiances which I'm finding really difficult. I used to have a really good memory but post-ED it's crap and very, very fuzzy around the edges. I can't really remember any firsts vividly except those that I'd rather forget. Studying writing is so much different than just punching out poems however and whenever you feel like it and I'm not used to it.

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